2017-06-04

"But, she's divorced." This perception must be totally erased from our dictionary 

   Each society has a specificity where individuals manage their lives accordingly. This specificity is emanated from an overwhelming ideology, religion or an inheritable tradition generation-by-generation to the degree that it's not smoothly to overstep this ingrained tradition by whichever means.
In this condition, every individual must have to be committed to the prevailing social rules. Otherwise, nothing tolerable with any attempt of overruling this especially in ultra-conservative societies where diversity is barely existent. It, therefore, has no place.
As people are categorized into different groups based on social status; males, females, single, widows, divorced and married. Each of which encounters certain social impediments. For instance, females have an interesting story full of challenges, and if we capture this very category, we'll touch upon that women have suffered much in many societies in all over the world, in terms of their struggle to get out of gender based social hegemony imposed on them throughout the course of history. 
Women in the U.S.A. have a benchmark on this thread, their struggle marked the U.S. archive passing through bumpy paths. It proved that the nature of human relations are characterized by a relentless struggle to regain the legitimate civil rights by the weaker group.
And, definitely, there are root causes behind this struggle that stir it up, masculinity, for instance, features a remarkable part. I can simply address that in my society it's a phenomenon outmaneuvers femininity on all aspects of life. To clarify it more, divorced women are harshly impacted within this realm which has a prolonged struggle, they haven't overcome the prevailing perception towards them yet for no reason other than being divorced where sadly certain groups consider them as a second-hand stuff. As such, the second chance that keeps her value comes out in return for a price she's supposed to pay, if she belongs to a wealthy family, then, the wealth will guarantee her a dignified second experience. Otherwise, the divorced would be sometimes subordinated to that horrible perception portraying her as a divorced that men rarely look up asking her to take up their new marriage offer, they think traditionally that as long as there are virgins. 
Whatever she does to prove the reverse of what the term "divorced" refers to, it implies a traditional anachronistic definition was apparently shaped at first by forefathers had lived even before the last generation long years ago, which is sadly still a deliberated term to describe women who are categorized as such.
But, does "divorce" stigmatize women?
To interpret it from a humanitarian perspective, not at all, divorce doesn't imply that women are discredited aftermath. It, actually, all about a social dilemma reverberates a convoluted way of thinking where the descendants of the last generations keep on to describe divorced in my society, it emanates from a feeling of superiority over the other sex.
The last story I heard through a conversation in a gathering where I was coincidentally made me upset to reconsider the matter from another angle to hopelessly get it washed away from our daily dictionary at the moment. 
It's a story of a cute woman got divorced after a long struggle to get her rights from her ex-husband. She's considered one of the elites in the village in terms of a great success in the academic field, she is prolific. However, she doesn't belong to a wealthy family, this status imposes on her to be subordinated to the prevailing unfair equation, she would have to carry the brunt of that unbearable social perception in a society sanctifies the woman as long as her virginity is fine. Her cuteness and success won't intercede to bail her out.
This bunch of persons got a news that this woman has gotten engaged again. The tale sharpened their curiosity so that they began gossiping and wondering, "from whom?"
The first person, "From that guy, do you remember him? He served a 7 years sentence in the Palestinian Authority's prison because he was a collaborator with Israelis."
The second one, "Gotcha! got it now, that guy is disreputable, how come her family accepted him as a second husband for their daughter? They're well-reputed people and moreover, have a national orientation."
"Come on man! don't forget that she's divorced, and assuredly the unbearable social pressure forced her to accept this collaborator, she might have found him a golden opportunity after having been painstakingly struggling to get her rights first after a long procrastination at the court including the social perception aftermath," said the third one.
In fact, collaborators in my society are ostracized whom people despise and don't deal with. They only get married from infamous people like them or underprivileged. It's actually not my topic to highlight the collaborators' issue, but, as those gossipers found it's much for this a cute woman to get married again which they relieved themselves when they had known the future husband is that scummy collaborator. Otherwise, she wouldn't have easily found a nice guy. What's a madness! 
It's hard to imagine if this backward way of thinking towards the divorce is rampant!
This story reflects how much superiority over divorced women is inculcated in the minds of people within traditionalist and tribal society. This obscurantist social perspective must be in any way faded away. It enhances an absurd discriminatory perception which generates only more fragmentation-based social status.
   
Note, warm apology in advance for using indecent words "vulgarity," it's the inescapable reality. Furthermore, doesn't represent the vast majority. 

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